Poems
To lose in light
I feel…sunk
Not stuck, sunk
Sunk into who I am
Into myself, others,
The world
I feel sunk into this deep hole of knowing and existing, and I can see light at the top and it isn’t far, but it isn’t here either.
I wonder what it would feel like to be at ground level, or better yet -
Up, way up there
But then again,
It’s cool and comfortable where I lie.
Exposed, or something else like that
My lips have been peeling for days
The more dry they become
The more I bite down
Revealing the next layer of raw skin
This layer then becomes the victim to the elements
Humid, stiff air
Turning
Cold, then harsh
Harsh, then cold
Both unpleasant
On my chapped, exposed skin
Little holes
Maybe empty
Maybe full
It’s hard
The tingling that turns into little holes
That widen and widen and widen
Into vast openness
That’s what I’ve been told
Holes Inside, Outside
Maybe it feels empty
maybe it feels full
I find it hard to tell when I feel as I
Have you ever gotten that sensation before
The tingling that turns into little holes,
that widen and widen,
and widen
into vast openness
Isn’t it good to be open though?
How I’ve been told to be
a last meal is better left unserved.
I know I have to face what’s under these heavy eyelids.
What’s weighed them down and under
by today’s sourness, tomorrow’s unease,
yesterday’s
egg washed dough
seemingly unappealing
baked, will become something ready for
an engulfing, soft belly
hungry no longer.
yet craving something of more content
best served alone.
no sancerre to wet the tongue, the lips,
only the moistness of saliva, as an oasis to self
— from the Self
a last meal is better left unserved.
the last breath unknown
the prior days an oasis from pain, barely weighed down by today’s sourness, and untouchable from tomorrow’s unease